November 7, 2004

MEANWHILE...

instpilot.jpg


It's been a busy week for Your's Truly. While it took me a little longer than I had initially hoped, I took my Instrument checkride on Saturday.

Passed it.

Earlier, when I had gotten my results on the written test, I went through a 24 hour period where I was so depressed and angry I wanted to jab #2 pencils into my eyes. As the guy at the testing center was printing out the result, he started smiling big and shook my hand.

'Congratulations! You passed! Excellent score!'

I couldn't read it from where I was standing. 'How many did I miss?'

'Only two! You got a 97%! That's one of the best---'

'Two? TWO?!! Jesus H. Chr---!"

'What's the matter? You've gone pale as a ghost! I said you passed!'

'Two wrong? TWO?? Son of a bitch! Goddam it!! Worthless sack of ' ' and so on. I wanted that 100 so bad. So bad. So very, very bad. Verrrry bad. Very, very bad. Real bad.

Anyway. Now I can fly from coast to coast and not see anything. It's really weird. Several times during training I'd fly to the Mojave, or to San Luis Obispo. I'd get out of the plane after landing, look around, and have no sense of having come here at all. Just gauges and dials and radials and vectors and assigned altitudes. Was in Santa Monica; now I'm in the desert. Never saw it change from one to the other. Very odd.

Just before my checkride, I took off into what I thought would be a typical thin marine layer. No such luck. Level at 4,000, you couldn't see the wingtip ' no exaggeration. So I look down and notice that my vacuum-driven attitude indicator ' I'm wearing AI goggles in the picture ' indicates a turn to the left, while my electrically driven Turn Coordinator shows a slight bank to the right.

That is an unpleasant feeling.

One of them is lying. Which one? Compass and vacuum driven directional gyro both showing a turn to the right. That agrees with the turn coordinator. The AI ' my primary flight instrument ' has failed, but the vacuum system doesn't seem to be the culprit since the DG ' also vacuum driven ' seems to be working fine. So now I have to use the altimeter to tell me when I'm climbing or descending.

First thing to do is cover the dead AI. It's right in front of my face and it's lying to me. I stick a failed instrument cover over it.

So there I was: surrounded by Bengal tigers'I mean'there I was, 4,000, somewhere over the Santa Monica foothills, can't see the wingtip, partial panel. It's one of those times ' I've had three or four now ' where you can feel that panic starting to squeal like a monkey trying to tear its way out of a paper bag. And you just have to beat it down through sheer will.

I turn to my flight instructor. He looks at me, smiles that sick, twisted, repulsive little smirk that Flight Instructors are trained to make.

'Bummer!' he says.

So I re-trim the airplane, and then, out of the blue, he gives me the best piece of advice I have ever gotten in my flight training. Ever. This will save my life innumerable times in the years to come, because I tried it, and damn, does it work!

I looked over at him. He said,

Bill? Kick it's ass!

CLICK!

That's all I needed to hear!

So I did! I kicked its ass!

Socal Approach, Cherokee Two Five Three Foxtrot Delta. We just lost our attitude indicator; we can continue the Burbank ILS.

I mean, we have to, don't we? They're not going to send up a helicopter and get us out by ladder. We've got to land this thing somehow.

Cherokee Three Fox Delta, roger.

Vectors for final, flew a perfect approach. About 1300 feet above our decision height, I could look straight down and see a little tiny oval of houses and streets. Thirty seconds later, we were below the layer, and there, about six miles ahead, I could see the approach lights to Runway 8 at Burbank ' not a little off to one side, not slightly off to the other' just a straight line of approach strobes ' the 'Rabbit' ' pointing straight smack down the runway centerline, which was to the right of me but to the left of the co-pilot.

I never thought I'd feel that good again ever in my life. Then came the election.

Anyway, I have read and done some minor tweaking to the essays. They are now ready to go to the publisher. The cover art will be ready in a few days. It will take about two weeks to get the book set up and a proof out, and then we are in business. Books should ship within 48 hours of getting the order.

I think I can assure you we will make Christmas. Price will be high for a run this small: about that of a printer cartridge. Pay me or pay Epson. Your choice. The essays will remain on the site for free, as they have been, and as all the new stuff coming will remain.

Home stretch now. Stocking stuffers coming your way. Papa needs a new pair of wings.

Posted by Proteus at November 7, 2004 11:01 PM







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Comments



Sierra Hotel man! Next stop, Astronaut Wings..I mean, you are in with SSOne guys, right?!

Great stuff, see you in the soup.

Cheers

Jack



Impatiently awaiting order link. :)

Congratulations, Bill! We knew you could do it!



Congrats Bill!

You're giving me the bug. There's a small airport a few miles away with a billboard stating they give lessons.

So many things to do in the next 6 months, and plenty of bills left to pay, but damn it's tempting me.

May go check them out tomorrow.



Way to go, bro! Up and certified.

Now, when do you transition to multi-engine jet?

Sapper Mike



Oh... re. the book. Three words:

Book On Tape

and three more:

James Earl Jones

It may just be me, but I think your essays would work really well in the medium of spoken word.

I know... JEJ would be too expensive, and he's probably a liberal. Ooo... James Woods would do great! Send him a free copy and see if he'd be interested.



Congratulations on the checkride. They say the instrument rating is the toughest! Of course, that nugget probably came from someone who never had to take a CFI initial with an FAA examiner (as opposed to a DPE). :)

--Ron



http://www.ejectejecteject.com/archives/INSTRUMENT PILOT.jpg

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(Just because Explorer converts spaces to %20 on the fly doesn't make it valid html....)

But, aside from that whining, Congratulations! I still have the t-shirt they cut the tail out of when I soloed back in '93.



way to go - next in the thrill department is the approach to minimums that you did not expect - had two last month in an old seminole :)



Hehehehe! Top Ten!



Oh... and I, for one, have my wallet open and ready to go. You provide the button, we'll provide the cash.



Congrats Bill. Wanting to be a pilot has always been a dream of mine since I was a little kid. Horrible vision finally got cured by Lasik, so the "bug" is back. Now if I can just work on my blood pressure to pass the medical....



Congratulations, Bill, on the Deliberate Acts of Pilotage, and on the book's progress.

Did someone say book-on-tape? Very nice, very nice indeed.



Hoo-HOO! Excellent, Mang! Can't wait for the cross-country in the Velocity -- Orlando to L.A., small wing in front, big wing (and the prop) in back, and point-to-point damn-the-weather in between!

Damn proud of you, dude.

However, the more I see of the requirements for an IFR rating, the less inclined I am to go beyond my Complex and High Performance ratings. As it turns out, toddling around the sky in a cast iron tub like the Cherokee is perfectly sufficient for me.

Still, GRAND news for you. Sincerest congratulations. And set aside 7 copies of the book for me, while you're at it.

GHS



Congrats.
Instrument rated; way to go!

I passed my written with three wrong....damn! Did all my training in Socal too....MYF in San Diego.

"Kick its ass!"



Master of the Air! May your takeoffs minus your safe landings always equal zero.



It seems kind of pointless to say this...so many others have and so many more will in the future. But seriously, man...congrats. (And although I've never taken the IFR written test, I certainly know the feeling of anger and disappointment of getting 97% when you'd hoped for 100%. :) )

The news about the book is great...as are many others here, I'm looking forward to my chance to buy a copy. But the really important thing is the passing of this milestone in a great journey by a great man.

Good for you. We're all proud.



Congrats on the IR!! I passed my private checkride back in '95 and then lapsed due to that Irish guy who lives in my empty wallet...Lack O'Funds. (groan) Anyway I applaud you both on the flying and the writing, they are both interests of mine as well.

I've been a frequent forum poster @ the JREF since 2001 (aka Rikzilla) and would love to start a blog but haven't quite figured out the best way to go about it.

Luckily my financial outlook is starting to clear up and I'm looking at next summer to resume flying with an eye towards taking an instrument rating.

I've flown as co-pilot and all around extra set of eyes under instrument conditions (a snow storm at night in Maryland)...while shooting the final approach our landing lights made the rushing snow look like one of those screen savers and gave me a very, very weird case of the leans! My pilot flew the instruments perfectly and we landed safely...but he later told me how hard it was for him to stay on the instruments. He had a touch of disorientation too!

Single engine IFR has been a scary proposition to me ever since...your partial panel experience kinda confirms this for me...losing the AI must have been creepy...but losing your fan woulda been worse!

Take care man,...stay safe,...kick some ass!
-Rick



RE: book on tape--James Earl Jones? James Woods? Maybe.

But what about Bill Whittle? If he can't read fire and brimstone into his own essays, I'll eat my AI goggles.

(btw, congratulations.)



Congrats!
The commercial check ride is a lot of fun - take it soon before you get rusty!

Roger



Well, congrats!



Congrats from a spam-can driver for whom IFR means "I Follow Roads." :-)



krakatoa's books-on-tape suggestions sounds just dandy, as does TPK's suggestion that you provide the voice.

May I call dibs on a flight to SLO, home of my alma mater? I'll bake lotsa cookies for ya. Pretty please?



You really don't have to be a compulsive flight maniac to like Bill's essays, but it helps. Gotta add my congratulations--- I only have an inkling of the discipline and effort involved, but I understand the obsession.

I got hooked early, going up in the Goodyear Blimp over Long Beach, CA back in 1957, then up in a Cessna over Oxnard in 1958. Yahoo!

If Bill gets a commercial license, he can probably book tours where he takes a bunch of fans up, and recites his thoughts to'em while he pilots.

Hey, it could happen. Norfolk airport used to make pots of money from a bunch of coin-operated squawk-boxes mounted around the municipal airport. Each one was emblazoned with the alluring come-on, "Pay a Quarter! Hear Pilots Talk! Airport Facts!"

Congrats, Bill!



Other smarter people have likely already got this plan in motion, since it seems such an obvious one:

Secure our Southern border: Drop Michael Moore smack in the path of all those infiltrating terrorists.

He is currently approximating the aspect of a termite queen, needing only a few more deep-fat-fried Twinkies to achieve total immobility. Sneaky terrorists will be repulsed by the prospect of having to circumnavigate his immensity. Imagine the smell... the fashion lapse... the likelhood of being forced to hear him brag about his oscar and all the celebrities who have talked with him.

Even vicious bombers and beheaders will tremble and hesitate.

I betcha.



Bill

Congrats on passing the "incalculable fear rating"........as I heard it referred to at a very early visit to Oshkosh.

I'm in the same boat as Krakatoa in so far as the bug. Krak is right......you're really begining to feed that bug.

Keep up the good work and thanks for sharing this with us.

Chris



Congratulations to you! IFR is the hardest of the licenses to get. Commercial should be easy compared to this.

Sooooo... when do you start on your homebuilt? :)

--Lance



Congrats? For doing something simple? I hate to brag, so I won't, but instrument flight has become so simple as to be simple nuance, until you mess up of course. "The edge of life is that moment you recall, many many times, how close you were to losing it". I actually survived more "mistakes" than anyone thought of teaching. Chuck Yeager, or Chuck Norris, I forget which due to my age, taught me basics, so that I can teach others. The only lesson I survived was the one that taught me so much, life is tenuous. Life is grand, Life is what we live for. I want everyone to experience life, joy, and a culmination of all they worked so hard to attain. I suppose you worked hard, and tried harder, to attain this simple goal, a life well lived :) Congrats, you simple willed moron, you are one of us.

Rik



Stop writing about aviation, you're making me far too anxious to actually start my private SEL training.



Dear Rik,

A quick review of my log books confirms that I spent at least as much time airborne testing home-made parachutes by jumping off the cinderblock wall at my parents' house than Bill spent getting his instrument rating. But HIS efforts left him smarter, conscious (mostly) and not conspicuously in need of first aid.

Wish I'd had Chuck Yeager advising ME...



Congratulations on passing the checkride, Bill. It's been over 8 years since I passed mine, and I've rarely used it since, but it's made the difference on a few occasions between getting there and, well, not. Plus, it's fun to grab an instructor and go out under the Foggles to knock the rust off every so often. Your aviation writing is at least as good, if not better, than most of what I read in the glossy aviation mags - you should apply to some of them!



Kudos, Bill. I never got an IFR; couldn’t have used it in the ’46 Cessna 140 (rag wing) that I wish I still owned. It sure was fun for poking holes in the sky and landing on levees and old forestry service clearings. Point to point cross countries were boring to this wannabe brush pilot.:) Now radio control planes and helicopters are my passion, and I get to “fly” several times a day, almost every day, without even having to leave my property. Hey, next time you fly into San Luis Obispo e-mail me your ETA and N-number. I’d be honored to buy you lunch.

Regards,

Dave



So now you can *really* have your head in the clouds! Congratulations. I remember the feeling from a few years ago... its a tough feeling to beat.

Any chance of an ejectejecteject mini-rally at Oshkosh this year??



Your flight instructor has a good sense of humor. Here's my flight instructor story:

When I was on my first night flight my instructor talked about engine-out procedures in the pre-flight briefing. As he got to the end of the briefing he said "When you believe you're close to the ground but you can't see anything, turn on the landing lights, pick a logical place to land and use a soft-field landing technique when you land."

I asked him "What if I turn on the lights and don't see anyplace to land?"

His answer: "Turn off the lights."



Congrats on the ticket. Nothing like coming out from under the hood after a long cross country and seeing the destination dead ahead.

BTW, James Earl Jones is listed as a "rightie" in this http://celiberal.com/theRighties.php celebrity list. It's an interesting list, and includes "why" links for many of them.

Cheers.



Congratulations! And thank you!

Multiple book orders forthcoming.



Dear David, Chuck never taught me a thing, I just watched in awe. NOW I watch what matters. Landing on the moon? Big whip. I too skinned a few knees, perhaps lost my mind, but we always came back. When a private business can send a man into outer space, almost for fun, or just to prove they can do it, and they prove it...well, nuff said. How many billions did they spend you ask? Most of us know, so we won't dwell on what is obvious. Our federal government has but one purpose, to protect our homeland, however illegally aquired. I try not to step on toes, but david is equal to any diatribe I am able to come up with, this is why I love this atmosphere.

Rik



Good on you, man.

--The Somalia hero and ex-POW Michael Durant, SOF helo pilot, said once that if you don't learn something *every time you fly*, then you aren't doing it right.

--To drive a submarine in this man's Navy, you have to go through checkouts and tests. It is considered profound wisdom to never OVERstudy for a test...



When you think of it, Submarines are probably going to be the vehicle of choice for exploring a lot of GAS GIANTS in our own solar system. They will have to be "flown" in an atmosphere that can crush them just as certainly as can the Earth's ocean depths.

And it will probably be the same sort of "IFR" regime--- flying blind, using sonar, radar, and inertial guidance systems. It will probably take people who combine Bill's talents with those of Chap. I'm lucky if I can maneuver out of my driveway without altering the appearance of my vehicle.



Congratulations Bill! Please drop me a line if you'd like me to e-mail you the account of my first IFR flight (it was solo) after my checkride back in Feb, 03. Let's just say the HI didn't work quite right and there was some ice....



"So now I have to use the altimeter to tell me when I'm climbing or descending"... No vertical climb indicator?

Ten hours into my IFR training, but we're also deep into regatta season, which isn't helping. (I get to row a marathon race this weekend.) This would be a lot easier without that damned working-for-a-living thing.



David, you do yourself injustice by besmirching your driving talents before allowing me such a pleasure. Wait, you do me an injustice by preemptive strikes against yourself. I hate old senile men, wait...never mind.

Rik



To set the record straight, I lied when I said I thought Kerry would win, we were hedging our bets. Better yet, we care more for this country than one man, we care for each other, everyone of us that is American. I often ask who cares. It is not rhetorical, I care. I hope we all care, we are intermixed, all dependent on each other. I have this huge desire for others to see my point of view, my side of the issue, what I think is right for this country. Only by seeing your side can I really understand what we fight for. Someone inferred that I might be suckling up to others because I agreed, perhaps so. Some days I think I have all the answers, most days I know I know nothing, and completely inadequate, irresponsible, and unable to secure even the most simple life. "The right to pursue happiness"? I attempt not "holy talk", for I know it pisses off those that are not holy, but what does that mean? I think it means you have a right to pursue a dream, your own dream, with your own values, and your own talents, your own resources. There goes the government in that dream. I would love a debate about what the government can actually procure for one willing and able to work, one that actually cares for America.

Dav...wait, I mean Rik



Looking forward to your book. I'll be watching along with so many others for a link to order. Thank you.



Bill, heartiest congratulations on the IFR ticket. Mine is now framed as my ticker has doomed my passing the physical. It was one hell of a learning experience. Learning to fly is the greatest feeling one can achieve. Adding the IFR Rating is absolute ectasy. I got mine in a Cherokee in 1985, missed three on the test, and my CFI and I both agreed that my answers were the "most correct". I wanted that 100% badly as well. My very first totally in the soup experience involved a 10 minute hold at a VOR intersection in traffic. A little scary, but never had any equipment failures. Another time, suffered vertigo/disorientation making an inbound turn to the localizer in the soup, and thank G-d for the training, or I certainly would have bent that airplane.



Bill,

Sierra Hotel indeed!!!! If you think instruments is hard, try learning to hover a helo! (just kidding!) ;)

Great news about the book as well. I look forward to buying a few for some friends and family, will make a most excellent X-mas gift.



P.S. I got a 98% on the mil comp test, and it pissed me off to no end... I think I missed the question about how often you need to check your transponder (24 months, 36 months, 18 months?)



“. . . try learning to hover a helo!”

And if you think that is hard, try learning to do it inverted while standing outside of it and looking at it nose on. Flying a radio control helicopter is about the ultimate in eye-hand coordination – thank goodness for computer simulators for practice.

Regards,

Dave

-



deleteth ye not the word of the lord for it was you that elected a fundemantalist president!

[YE OLDE "DELETETH" KEY WORKETH AS WELL ON THE ZEALOT AS ON THE HARLOT, THE FANATICAL AS WELL AS THE HERETICAL. LET THIS ENDETH HERE WHILST THIS YET BE BUT A JOKE, LEST THE "DELETETH" KEY BE PUT ONCE MORE TO GOOD WORK -- GHS]



Congrats, Bill!

I'm ready for the book. Thank goodness it will be available for Christmas. I hope the cover art is good. I know the interior is.

My own audio recording of "History" keeps getting passed around. My brother played it for his senior high philosophy class on Election Day and he said he wasn't the only one to wipe away tears. I'm not a trained voice talent, either. I can imagine what Bill's essays would sound like when read by a real artist. Wow.

(I received permission from Bill to make the audio -- the restriction was not to sell it.)

However audio recording is quite expensive so in order to justify the expense Bill's book is going to have to sell very well. Here's hoping it sells very, very well!



So what were the two questions you missed? I will always remember the one question I missed: Do you need an Instrument rating to fly Special VFR at night?



While we wait for more from Bill, I thought I'd offer up one of my own essays that I'm particularly happy with:

http://the-zoo.blogspot.com/2004/11/whither-humanity.html



I've got fifteen hours in helicopters, so I had the best of both worlds: I got to fly a real helicopter, and I got to hover upside down. Briefly. It was a crosswind.

Yeah, that's it! A CROSSWIND!



Way to go! What a thrill to pass the instrument checkride! May your localizer and glideslope needles never get in a swordfight on short final in the clag.



Upside down in a cross wind is impressive, the controls reverse, one must keep a clear head. I could never keep such a clear head, most of my upside down encounters were shear panic, and conclusively demeaned my abilities. I would accept a 1 on that test, survived the ordeal. Amazing what a 1 can survive, if he understands the loss of failure. Test pilots love that 1, no other score matters. Politics allow all sorts of scores, I survived what most will never know, thank god. I will comment only this once about war, and our losses, what we fight for, and why. I fought the 3rd world war, and believe "WE" as a whole won it. Do not be so foolish as to think the war is over, it is just in a new world. Choose well the world you want, for it is your future. Man is in nature an animal, the passive animal is neither wrong nor right, only willing to be passive. A mother protects her young in nature, often fights and dies to do so. But no animal in nature finds common allies to destroy as man does, this is where we lost our course. I lived in a time we Americans came up with a 72 megaton bomb, the russians tested over 100 megaton bombs, does anyone really understand how this affected, or could affect our world? In hindsight, how lucky we are to be alive. Sanity somehow prevailed. Or did it. English says never start a sentence with a preposition, I accept most rules. This is YOUR world, not mine, I am dead.

Rik



Correction, the Soviet Union never tested their 100+ megaton bomb, but they had one on paper. Having witnessed a 4 megaton test, I have no desire to even think about witnessing an even bigger bomb. Our smallest "nuke" was a one man weapon, though heavy, it was similar to an rpg type launcher. We actually thought we could wage a "controlled nuclear war" Sometimes I wonder myself what I am trying to say.

Rik



Some years back there were reports that some knuckleheads in our defense apparatus were actually considering a design for a nuclear HAND GRENADE!!!!!

That might just be a silly rumor. I know critical mass is actually a RELATIVE thing--- meaning that ANY amount of fissionable material theoretically could be compressed to a DENSITY at which it goes critical--- meaning only that it a chain reaction of thermal-energy neutrons would cascade out of control because the density of fissionable nuclei is so great that free neutrons are likely to be absorbed and cause more unstable nuclei to fission, giving off... etc., etc.

You would have to have a hell of a throwing arm...



i only said the meek shall inherit the earth....see theres a difference between inheriting it and stealing it :)



Congratulations on the wings, Bill! Sportin' a new pair myself.

There's a lot to be said for autorotations.



Are you SURE you want a small book run? I plan to buy several copies myself...



Dave, you are quite correct, we did study this option. I can not ellaborate further.

Rik



Congrats Bill. I never finished my flight training due to lack of funds but 30 years ago I was KING OF THE WORLD. Cessna 150 - very forgiving, responsive, and like a horse on the the last leg of it's journey it could find its own way home.
I do remember putting the blinders on a couple of times. People who haven't flown have no idea how a student pilot relying on instruments only can easily make his good day go bad (and make up=down, right=left). Pretty sure that's how new math started.

Steve



Congrats on passing your IFR check ride.

To all those unfamiliar with IFR check rides, FAA Designated Examiners are notoriously tough bastards - as they should be. Passing the IFR check ride is a true milestone for any pilot, second only to a new pilot's first flight.

My first flight was down the Hudson River in 1982, circling the Statue of Liberty at 800 feet above the water. As I circled around back to the north, there before me were the majestic towers of the WTC rising even higher into the sky. What a sight! Alas, no new pilots will ever share this experience.

Thank you for your service to our nation as a citizen-wordsmith fortifying the hearts and minds of our citadel.

The patriot, Thomas Paine, was an overweight, unattractive, neer-do-well who was considered by most who knew him to be a complete pain in the ass, yet, he wrote the political pamphlet "Common Sense" that stirred the soul of a fledgling nation and changed the course of history. I do not know whether or not he wore pajamas, but Thomas Paine was surely one of America's first pajamahadeens.

Long live the pajamahadeen!